Brick Walls

​Once again in my life, change is in the air. That's right, I am entering a transitional phase. Actually, I have been in transition for quite some time over the course of the last few years. Losing your lifemate will do that, and even though seven and a half years have passed since I became a widow, I still have not decided what I want to be or where I want to live when I grow up.

The last six years have been an adventure and a learning experience for me. In my life, I do not call them mistakes, just learning experiences. For example, in April 2014, I moved with my partner to the rainforest of Washington state, hoping to start a new life there, meet new people and purchase our dream home. Well ... that did not materialize. But was it a mistake attempting it? Absolutely not.

My philosophy is this. When you keep running up against brick walls, something ... or somebody ... is trying to tell you something. I have had enough brick walls now to realize that I'd better start paying attention. I am not getting any younger and I'd better find "home" soon ... and stay put once I'm there.

I've explored many different areas of the country and I've considered trying places I've never been to. But it's a little late in the game to be wandering around, on a fixed income, looking for The Dream. I believe my destiny lies not too far away. I'm hoping that when spring comes, I can go HOME. And home to me is a valley in the mountains where I lived with my lifemate for 17 inspiring years.

Life is a journey, and love is eternal. Just because I may be going off on my own in a few months does not mean that love has been dissolved. It just means the lessons I was meant to learn from this person are now complete, and I am ready to go to the next level ... independence.

But more about my plans later. For the moment, I am content to rest through January and February, get things sorted out in my life, and continue writing on my next novel.